Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
