I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize