woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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