How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
God, I missed his penis.
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