Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
