Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
