Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
