I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Randomize
