your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
