that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
