Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
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I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
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My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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