Texts From Last Night

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  (650): View more from California

  i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!

  (408): View more from California

  Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...

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  (650): i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner! (408): Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland... http://tfl.nu/1sp2
  Replies (41) Good night (3270) Bad night (666)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.

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  (403): you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned. http://tfl.nu/4rjg
  Replies (14) Good night (3575) Bad night (603) Order T-Shirt
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?

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  (623): Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth? http://tfl.nu/7zio
  Replies (34) Good night (713) Bad night (11668) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?

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  (443): hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"? http://tfl.nu/cmo1
  Replies (23) Good night (1209) Bad night (5366)
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  (516): View more from New York

  ...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?

  (585): View more from New York

  hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that

  (516): View more from New York

  is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?

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  (516): ...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year? (585): hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that (516): is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ? http://tfl.nu/juy6
  Replies (139) Good night (7661) Bad night (1074)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.

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  (203): Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet. http://tfl.nu/z4ao
  Replies (24) Good night (7391) Bad night (1519) Order T-Shirt
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'

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  (484): I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock' http://tfl.nu/bqqm
  Replies (12) Good night (4645) Bad night (733) Order T-Shirt
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  (253): View more from Washington

  I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.

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  (253): I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end. http://tfl.nu/6ben
  Replies (9) Good night (3230) Bad night (805) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order

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  (443): Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order http://tfl.nu/s460
  Replies (4) Good night (1081) Bad night (482) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?

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  (917): mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right? http://tfl.nu/fjzr
  Replies (7) Good night (1155) Bad night (668) Order T-Shirt
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.

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  (813): Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it. http://tfl.nu/c8t4
  Replies (13) Good night (2047) Bad night (364) Order T-Shirt
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.

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  (785): Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life. http://tfl.nu/uwxb
  Replies (12) Good night (518) Bad night (1416) Order T-Shirt
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  (530): View more from California

  Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish

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  (530): Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish http://tfl.nu/hirn
  Replies (4) Good night (562) Bad night (351) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.

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  (815): After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin. http://tfl.nu/me1g
  Replies (3) Good night (836) Bad night (343) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition

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  (631): You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition http://tfl.nu/5r22
  Replies (2) Good night (328) Bad night (210)

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