he thought i was a dude.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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