Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
i think im in europe. pls send help
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