I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
