i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
