Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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