At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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