I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
