My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize