If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize