Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
