"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I don't deserve a penis
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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