I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
