I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize