You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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