she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize