he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Randomize