I wish I could punch you in the face.
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
