So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
accomplished twins. life is a go
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
