Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  Do you think there is vodka in heaven?

  (619): View more from California

  you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity

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  (858): Do you think there is vodka in heaven? (619): you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity http://tfl.nu/y8gk
  Replies (81) Good night (4104) Bad night (865)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money

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  (570): I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money http://tfl.nu/ayme
  Replies (40) Good night (4184) Bad night (864)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.

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  (647): You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened. http://tfl.nu/1lek
  Replies (32) Good night (18277) Bad night (829)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.

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  (248): Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in. http://tfl.nu/0n5k
  Replies (19) Good night (1129) Bad night (3995)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".

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  (845): She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex". http://tfl.nu/cd1v
  Replies (42) Good night (19621) Bad night (1334)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times

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  (978): Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times http://tfl.nu/be2v
  Replies (14) Good night (1609) Bad night (4401)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower

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  (614): He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower http://tfl.nu/xrd7
  Replies (4) Good night (2183) Bad night (752)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.

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  (727): He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god. http://tfl.nu/zb23
  Replies (22) Good night (965) Bad night (2616)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin

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  (714): My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin http://tfl.nu/22om
  Replies (10) Good night (1906) Bad night (799)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.

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  (803): My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol. http://tfl.nu/3the
  Replies (4) Good night (1472) Bad night (597)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.

  (1-440): View more from Ohio

  That's better than I've done so far.

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  (440): Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today. (1-440): That's better than I've done so far. http://tfl.nu/4hrm
  Replies (0) Good night (1064) Bad night (450)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember

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  (630): I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember http://tfl.nu/77e3
  Replies (1) Good night (590) Bad night (457)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.

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  (+44): We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever. http://tfl.nu/yqo8
  Replies (3) Good night (822) Bad night (264)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.

  (1-773): View more from Illinois

  Can you see in?

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  (773): Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter. (1-773): Can you see in? http://tfl.nu/hc5g
  Replies (1) Good night (336) Bad night (520)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.

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  (815): I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers. http://tfl.nu/2uqi
  Replies (1) Good night (454) Bad night (198)

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