I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
