On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
