i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
These tits shall not be calmed
Randomize
