i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
