I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
FUCK WHALES
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
