you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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