$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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