Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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