How'd it feel making her break her religion?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
