Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize