Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
