Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Someone came in the potted fern
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize