a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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