I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
