im drinking this country out of the recession.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
