Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
You pole danced in your parka.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize