Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
