I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize