Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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