We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
